I’ve never EVER been a size 6.
Sorry I haven’t been blogging. I work 6 days a week and party too much.
Tomorrow is August, that means two things for me:
1) Fork up that rent
2) THE FALL SEMESTER APPROACHES AHH!
And since I’ve taken the time to sit here on my ass at this computer. I decided to make a few school year resolutions. This summer has been rough on my possible paleo lifestyle.
- Swim between classes (Take advantage of the pool on campus!)
- Only use the bus when it’s -35C and you’re late for food chemistry
- Be completely Paleo committed
- Cook everyday
- Seriously buckle down and study
Lets review these goals when October comes around.
Okay kids, so I had my bike at work today and I though it would be a good idea to ride it home. Of course, once I finished my shift, the sky opened up like God was letting his sink drain and I dabbled in the idea of ditching my bike and taking a cab home.
And then I thought no Anita, you’re a strong woman, a little rain can’t hurt you!
So I secured my bag (filled with my iphone and other easily-water-destroyed objects), let my balls drop and pushed myself out into the storm.
I was immediately hit by what felt as if someone threw a bucket of water in my face, and regretted my decision. But there was no turning back now. I peddled furiously through the monsoon, with each breath bringing in a mouthful of water, I knew it was only a matter of time before I would feel the sweet warmth of a towel - and a dry pair of underwear.
Since the rain was so heavy, I had to squint to see the road in front of me. I ended up using just one eye for some reason because my left one kept burning from city rainwater. I had a permentant squint-face.
So while I’m biking down the wet, puddle filled street, I hear loud booms of thunder and flashes of lightening. I realized then that I’m covered in water and riding a metal bicycle. shift gears anita SHIFT GEARS
As the sky raged above me, my fear continued to fuel my legs and drive my bike through the town. I continued to ask myself, is it more dangerous to be in an open field or be underneath tall tress during a lightening storm?
(Also it takes me around 20 mins to bike from work to my apartment.)
I managed to take a break by a bridge with a roof and rung out my clothes so I wasn’t carrying 10lbs of water with me (now THAT’S a lot of WATER WEIGHT! HARHARHAR). During that time I checked on my water-wreckable belongings and grabbed my keys. Then I made it safely to my building.
Drenched. Squinty-faced. Covered in mud. But alive. Alive I tell you!
(Imagine this on a bike.)
Well, barely, alive.
Note to self: always take cabs during lightening storms.
- My Dad
Being a body-imaged obsessed teen, I didn’t take my father’s words to heart. I thought it was just some stock phrase parents use to brush off their daughter’s concerns about her body weight. But now, five years later, I find myself saying that same quote to a lot of my body-troubled friends.
Being active and treating your body well isn’t about obtaining an ideal body. It’s about just feeling positive. Feeling sexy. Feeling accomplished. Like I said in a previous post, being healthy shouldn’t be about reached goal weights. It’s when you can get out of that sick mindset and start loving yourself no matter how you think you look.
Now that I feel like a part of the fitblr community, I see that there are a lot of people who in the pursuit of health, lose themselves and their positive body goals. They count calories, obsess over how much they run, obsess over their weight training and early morning work outs. They stress out over the slightest cheat, worry about family dinners and people’s opinions concerning their hard core healthy lifestyle.
Being healthy becomes a neuroticism.
And that can’t be healthy at all.
Weighed myself for the first time in 2 weeks! I’ve just been eating paleo. No extreme exercise or anything like that!
Last Weight: 148lbs
YAY FOR PALEO! ALL HAIL CAVEMEN AND CAVEWOMEN EVERYWHERE!
Things to do now:
- fix bike
- build muscle
- BE AWESOME
I find that in the pursuit of “being healthy” we seem to lose the psychological goals that we set for ourselves. By psychological goals I mean the goals you set for your mind, for your well being, for your spirit.
Physical goals in pursuing “healthiness” (whatever your definition of that may be) can include:
- losing weight
- gaining muscle
- increase endurance
While psychological goals in pursuing healthiness may include:
- increased self esteem
- positive body image
- feeling “good”
These psychological goals are usually in the background of physical goals, they underline the very essence of why you are pursuing a healthy lifestyle. For example: “By eating healthier I plan to lose weight and therefore increase my positive body image and my self esteem.”
The words in bold are not always said out loud, but they are there. They lurk deep within your ambitions, slowly carving your behavior and motivation.
Now onto my main point…
I was scrolling through my dash earlier today and I found a particularly interesting post about a fitblr’s anxiety when they had to eat at an “unhealthy” restaurant. They were completely distraught with the idea of ordering a salad while their entire family indulges.
Basically, I don’t think it’s right to have an anxiety attack over eating out with family. Even if you are on a strict nutritional diet, it’s not a bad idea to sit back and enjoy food and company. Your body can adjust after one meal that’s “outside of your plan”. All of your hard work will not go to waste. If you were consistent enough with your nutritional plan, one meal will not change anything.
I hate to see people suffer because of their dietary choices. Why make the choice if it’s just making your unhappy? You have to analyze your psychological goals behind your physical goals, and make your decisions then. A healthy diet choice should not be a stressful one. A healthy diet choice should not make you sad. A healthy diet choice should not make you throw a panic attack on the internet. A healthy diet is supposed to give you a happy mind and body, fueled by positive psychological goals.
My psychological goals include:
- positive body image
- supporting my local farmers
- scientific curiosity as to how my food affects my life
What are some of your psychological goals in becoming healthier?
I want to tone my abdomen. Does anyone have any short, convenient work out tips for a busy student?
I did paleo for a solid month in February (with minor cheats here and there at work) but nothing about my body was changing. I was confused, I even felt a little cheated because I gave up a lot of my favorite things for the sake of losing those last 10 lbs.
So I decided to calculate my BMI:
I’ve been seriously uncomfortable with the way I’ve looked for the greater part of my life. I’ve always been the tallest, the heaviest, etc. This 21.6 is a bit of a shock to me, because I’ve always thought I was overweight. And since I didn’t lose or gain any weight when I went paleo, I would’ve had a BMI 21.6 before I even started this health adventure. It makes me wonder about how my attitude towards my own body has changed.
For the first time in months I looked in the mirror, wearing my prospective bikini for the summer, I thought “Anita, you look good.”
Starting to eat paleo/primal has had an effect not just on what I put in my body, but it had a much greater effect on my psychology.
And that is the effect I will invest in.